When a ladder was stolen from a store the manager said that further steps would be taken.
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You know you are getting old when you think you should drive the speed limit.
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The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ...
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The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault.
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As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
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The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.
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A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
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There are three types of people in this world: those who make things happen, those who watch things happen and those who wonder what happened.
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